And we know that in all things God works for the good of
those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28 (NIV)
It’s been over a decade since I've been able to drive on a highway
with confidence; a decade since I have driven on an interstate at all. I even
had to re-learn how to drive myself to and from work, though it’s only ten
miles on a two-lane highway that even Amish buggies traverse with
finesse! Panic disorder can take many
forms, and this inability to drive was one of the most serious and inconvenient
ways that it took me.
Re-learning to drive myself to work and back meant that I needed
to find an alternative route. It’s one thing to face your fears, but when
that could mean passing out while at the wheel of your car, you need to come up
with a solution that won't potentially involve an accident. I found a back way
to work that was longer, more circuitous, and less convenient, but there were
fewer cars and I could do it.
It is prettier going the back way; the scenery distracts me
and keeps me occupied with gratefulness. There’s always some sort of
breath-taking surprise: The way the sun catches ice on the tips of
birch-branches; a glorious sky-scape or a bluebird on a fence-post; a flock of
turkeys; a herd of deer.
One morning, as I looked for the pair of wild swans I had seen the
day before on my way to and from work, I had a revelation: Had I never experienced
the panic that drove me to the back roads, I would have missed so many
surprises! It’s faster and more practical to go the straight route to
work.
G.K. Chesterton said that “An adventure is only an
inconvenience rightly considered. An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly
considered.”
I like an adventure that involves wild swans.
Beverly
